There’s no such thing as an actor who is comfortable with anything and everything. Anyone who tells you that they are is lying, probably because they’re afraid of what might happen if they say no. I want to preface this by saying that I’m not blaming actors here, this isn’t a matter of ‘You need to have more self-respect’. It’s true that actors do need to have self-respect and know their boundaries. But far too many fear the consequences for speaking their mind and having the ‘audacity’ to expect to be treated as a human, not a mannequin.

Share Your Boundaries With Your Agent

The fear of speaking up is often rooted in the scarcity mindset that actors suffer from, and the reliance they feel on others to find work for them. But your personal comfort is far more important than someone’s project, and actors have every right to put their foot down. It doesn’t make you a diva or difficult to work with. Why would you want to work with someone who doesn’t respect your personal boundaries?

There will always be an abundance of roles to audition for, roles that don’t involve nudity or sexual content (graphic or implied). If that matters to you, make sure that your talent reps are aware of this. Part of their job is to find or refuse work on your behalf, which they can do much more effectively if they know the things that get a hard no from you.

Communicate Your Boundaries With Other Actors

Wouldn’t it be great if actors could just read each other’s minds? Sadly we don’t live in that extremely convenient simulation, so working actors involved in stunts and intimate scenes alike need to speak up. Actors shouldn’t assume that their scene partners can inuit or understand what their boundaries are. If the scene that you’re in teeters towards something that you’re not comfortable with, say so. There’s always a chance that your scene partner might have reservations of their own. 

Talk about your boundaries, triggers, comfort levels, the whole shebang. Once you know each other’s comfort zones, block the scene(s) accordingly. Every line, every step, every move, every touch, everything. Be supportive towards one another and mindful of each other’s limits – there’s nothing unprofessional about saying no, but there’s plenty unprofessional and unethical with ignoring a no.

Talk To Coaches

Your acting coach can offer some invaluable advice when it comes to putting on an authentic performance, but they’re not the only type of coach that career actors can rely on. Intimacy coaches are reguarly sought out by productions to help with scenes that involve sexual content. From nudity to some good ole’ fashioned sexual tension in an enemies-to-lovers trope, intimacy coaches help actors give an authentic and engaging performance without crossing anyone’s boundaries or interfering with the creative vision.

Considering that the MeToo movement began with Hollywood, it should come as no surprise that productions are starting to get more rigid about that sort of thing. Lizzy Talbot, an intimacy coordinator and intimacy director, said that her process is to “…have a chat with the director and just be like, OK, so what’s your vision just overall?…I’m here to help create that vision in the safest and most dynamic way possible”. Much of her work is done pre-production so as to avoid the worst case scenario. “I never want an actor to find out what their boundaries are in the moment because the chances are if that’s happening, it’s already too late, the boundaries are already being crossed.”

Actors, Know Your Worth!

Actors don’t exist to speak someone else’s words or mimic a figment of the producer’s imagination. Actors breathe life into an otherwise lifeless vision with a performance that can move you to tears or laugh until your stomach hurts. Actors deserve much better than what they’re currently given, and I know that independent actors have the power to reshape the way the entertainment industry perceives and treats entertainers as a whole. I hope you find these acting tips not only helpful, but empowering.

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